That's the reason you're here anyway, right?
Of course, arguing is our least favorite thing to do but it happens. In a marriage/relationship, two people with two different personalities, different opinions, and different likes and dislikes are joined together as one. There will be disagreements and that’s okay. The trouble comes when you don’t know how to argue or disagree. So from my own experience and the word, I have compiled some tips and reminders on how to do it:
Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. Matt. 18:15 KJV
1. Pray before confronting.
2. Think before you speak.
3. The goal is NOT to be “right” or to “win.” The goal is to express your point of view.
4. Ask yourself how you would feel if you were in “Bae’s shoes.”
5. It’s okay to agree to disagree.
6. Respect the point of view and feelings of your significant other. Even if you don’t agree, RESPECT the other’s point of view.
7. Pick your battles wisely. Some things aren’t that deep and won’t need to be addressed. Save yourself the argument.
8. Don’t take things too far, hit below the belt, or cross boundaries. Learn those boundaries.
9. Practice to shut up. (lol) Seriously, learn when to bite your tongue. Are you willing to let your pride or your opinion cost you your marriage? Contrary to the popular lie, words do hurt and can lead you to a point of no return.
10. Listen to understand, not just to offer a rebuttal.
11. Apologizing is not an admission of guilt. It’s okay to say, “I’m sorry that I hurt you.”
12. Communicate without yelling or insulting.
13. Be angry without sinning. Don’t go to bed angry. Eph. 4:26 Tomorrow is not promised, regardless of how old or young you are. FIX IT BEFORE BED!
14. Keep your hands, feet, and all other objects to yourself.